We had the opportunity to attend an interesting Salon Talk, hosted by Like Minds and led by internationally renowned therapist Marisa Peer. As a therapist, speaker and columnist Marisa has established herself as an authority on counselling and healing, and you can read more about her here.
Marisa’s talk was ‘How To Mastermind Your Life In 4 Easy Steps’, something she insists is “not a challenge at all”. For those of us who have trouble balancing family, work, social life and the other aspects of the day to day world this sounds intriguing.
Although Marisa’s advice is to individuals, we felt it could be equally well applied to business and entrepreneurship. Here’s what we took away from the event:
1. Don’t Let In Negative Criticism. One of Marisa’s primary tenets is that everyone suffers from the same problem. We fear rejection. All our actions stem from a primal and tribal urge to be accepted. Because of this, negative words from others can seriously damage our wellbeing. Likewise in business, you’ll encounter many naysayers but if you don’t let that negativity in it can’t harm you. The world said tablet computers were unnecessary and pointless. Tell that to Apple.
2. Do Not Criticise Yourself. If the words of others are damaging, then what you tell yourself is potentially disastrous. Think about all the negative thoughts you’ve ever had about yourself. Now imagine if you spoke to your best friend that way. How long would they stick around? Not too long. Your mind believes what you tell it, and using negative words such as ‘idiot’ or ‘moron’ about yourself will create a self-fulfilling prophecy. When it comes to business it’s important to project a positive message and image about your company and what you can do, otherwise why will customers want what you have to offer?
3. Praise Yourself. Research shows that people who are happy and successful rely on internal self-validation not external validation. If you need other people to tell you that you’re doing a great job you’ll be too worried about pandering to others rather than focussing on doing the best job you can do. You know you can do it, and you know you’re doing a good job, so get on with it.
4. Enough Is Enough. You should start and end every day by telling yourself: “I’m <insert word here> enough.” For individuals this could be acknowledging that you’re beautiful enough, rich enough etc. If you don’t feel like you are “enough” then you’ll strive dangerously to fulfil an infinite pit of need. By accepting things we can continue to function healthily. This one might sound counterproductive for business, after all if you’ve got enough then how will your company grow and succeed? For business this means accepting that you do a good job and not trying to do too many things poorly. Focus on what you do well instead of trying to be all things to all people.
We’re interested in how we can bring this to our business lives. What do you think? Can we still be ambitious if we are allowing ourselves to be ‘enough’? Marisa says yes – we need to be ‘strong’ enough to overcome our challenges. Chat to us on Twitter.
Salon talks usually take place on or around the second Tuesday of the month and places fill up quickly. Attendees relish the opportunity to network intimately with fellow business owners and entrepreneurs and often chat with the speakers. More info here.
They’re not usually this abstract either. Take a look at this summary from Philippa Snare’s June Salon Talk (Chief Marketing Officer at Microsoft UK)
Above image from the event was kindly shared with us by Gabrielle Laine-Peters, Like Minds Salon Talk host. If you’ve got any questions, she’d love to hear from you.